SELF-PARENTING POEM

As a Self-mastered adult....

If I dont learn how to fulfill my emotional dependency needs, then I'll never feel safe, sane, and secure in the world; for I'll always have to look to others to tell me who I am.

If I don't expect emotional intimacy, I am saying that..."I'm Ok with your being emotionally distant from me," and I'll distance myself for fear of rejection.

If I don't demonstrate unconditional love for my Self, I am showing people that "I'm not worthy of recieving love, nor your benefit of the doubt."

If I don't demand respect, I'll give people permission to treat me disrespectfully; for I teach people how to treat me by the way I treat myself.

If I don't use my adult powers, I'll fall prey to my own "child-like" ego defenses; and the walls I build will keep out the love I seek.

If I don't maturely defend my boundaries with my adult powers, then people will "trespass" me just as they did when I was a powerless child!

If I don't give my Self permission to be myself, then people will "mold me" into who they want me to be, taking me further away from the light of my real Self and closer to the darkness of my "persona" (mask).

If I don't learn to validate and release my feelings, then my feelings will create dis-ease within me; for dis-sease is a perfect creation: a negative feeling made manifest.

If I beat my Self up when I "act" with "less-than-perfect" behavior, then I am affirming that, "I AM my behavior" and not a child of God.

If I'm not willing to practice my Self-parenting skills until they become a part of my consciousness, then when life "tests" me I'll attempt to protect my Self using immature, childlike, ego-based methods.

If I don't "respond with ability" to make my life emotionally, sexually, and physically Safe, Sane, and Secure, then I'll live a life of "quiet desperation," comfortable in my "uncomfortable-ness" and fearful of life's opportunities, unable to fulfill my divine birthright, a life worthy of a child of God.

HU-JI

"What is Real?"

My father copied and framed this quote from The Velveteen Rabbit and gave it to my daughter for Christmas back in 2004. On the back of the frame he wrote:

Riley-
Have your mom and dad read this to you everyday until you can read it yourself and always
remember what it means to be "real".

Grandpa Woody
I love you very much


"What is Real?" asked the Rabbit one day when they were lying side by side....."Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out-handle?"
"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but Really loves you, then you become Real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.
"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."
"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"
"It doesn't happen all at once, "said the Shin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.


Margery Williams